Wednesday, June 14, 2006

She'll pretty much have to and other thoughts

First, last night I won back-to-back poker tournaments at Coyote. I got lucky and sucked out on a couple hands, but overall I just played pretty well. I am getting a lot better at reading people and also being patient, which is really, really hard for me.

Today, is DC Bach’s birthday. If you haven’t wished him a happy one, you should, especially if you are a hot slut.

I have several pictures to post from the cage match Kassy and I had this past Saturday. They’re pretty cute if you like pictures of school girls dancing up on each other with Asian chicks.

So, after I placed a comment on First Date DC earlier, I thought of a story to tell from that school girl night.

A very WASPy looking girl and frat G-town looking guy were watching the crowd and dancing from two chairs in the corner. He got up and I decided to take a breather from dancing and sat down next to the girl. She smiled awkwardly.

V: Your boyfriend bring you here?
WASP: My fiancé.
V: He used to bring his ex-girlfriends here?
WASP: Yes, he said it can be fun sometimes.
V: You having fun.
WASP: (obviously lying) Oh yeah, it’s great.
V: Really because you aren’t dancing or even dressed up.
WASP: Well, I guess it’s a little intimidating.
V: Sure. You know, probably all your boyfriend wants is to get another attractive girl in the mix.
WASP: (eyes widen) You think.
V: He’s a guy right? And, if he used to come here w/ his ex I am sure it was for threesomes or maybe an orgy.
WASP: I’m not having an orgy.
V: I don’t blame you. But if you’re smart, you’ll pick out some hot girl and bring her into the couple. Someone you like. If you do that he probably won’t drag you to clubs like this anymore.
WASP: I don’t think that’s what he wants.
V: Okay sure, but see what his reaction is when you suggest it.
WASP: (Glares at V) Maybe.

So that sucks for her, right. I mean she is S-C-R-E-W-E-D in not the good way. This guy neglected to mention before he slipped on that rock that he likes it freaky. And, we're not just talking a diamond for a BJ, or hey honey, let's try anal. Brother wants to get down.

But, now that little darling is in love with him, planning her wedding and she has to start worrying about how to keep this guy on the hook until the big day.

I wonder how many girls get roped into this situation? They are so excited to finally get engaged to “Mr. Right” who seems quite satisfied with their current sex life and then suddenly he suggests something that “might be fun…me and my ex used to do…”

I mean what the hell is she supposed to say? And sure, maybe he’ll get lucky. Maybe she’s had it in her all along. But probably, if the reason she is experimenting is to just keep him around, it just won’t last. She’ll feel uncomfortable, resent him and punish him in other ways in their daily life, probably mostly by nagging and bitching.

He’ll have her half-assed attempt to spice things up and when that fails, he will start looking elsewhere for what he needs—something he should have admitted in the first place. But how does a guy go about doing that? When is the right time?

Well, I’ll tell you when it’s not the right time, after you’ve asked her to marry you.


Blogger O-FACE said...

Some girl just died from flesh eating bacteria.....She might of been at the club...But everybody has a freak flag in them..everybody, it just hasn't been raised yet. Nothing a little vodka or grand marinier can't fix..........

2:09 PM  
Blogger V said...

What are you talking i am itching...

2:20 PM  
Blogger Buttercup Allbright said...

My friend "C-Note" said this just the other day (paraphrased to protect the not-so-innocent):

LOL, I know the type!! It's the surprise freak! One day 6 months
into the relationship, the guy is preparing for some regular ole
missionary, and she's like "well, I have these handcuffs, chaps,
paddles, rope and clothespins laying around, wanna try something a LITTLE different" and he just shows up at work the next day and quietly cries at his desk.

2:25 PM  
Blogger V said...

Buttercup: That is funy, but you know it ain't a party without chaps and clothespins, eh :)

2:33 PM  
Blogger DC Cookie said...

Hey - at least they haven't walked the aisle yet...

2:38 PM  
Blogger Ashburnite said...

It's been my experience that those preppy guys are the freakiest. It's like a "wolf in sheep's clothing" syndrome or something. Maybe that's why I like the preppy men- I know that there's a freak inside just waiting to get out.

2:41 PM  
Blogger V said...

DC Cookie: True that, who knows what he'd be asking for if they had :)

Ash: Very interesting...I've never dated a preppy-type, but I have always expected as much...I mean if pink polo shirts don't say "flog me," what does?

2:54 PM  
Blogger Ashburnite said...

"I mean if pink polo shirts don't say "flog me," what does"


but it's been my (albeit limited) experience that these preppy guys are the more dominant type. I don't know if it's because they have to compensate for looking so gay all of the time or not. hmmm....I'm thinking that I need to do a study now- b/c I'm just thinking back to the more masculine guys that I've dated who were not at all dominant in the bedroom vs the preppy guys who were into all kinds of freaky shit. Interesting.....

2:58 PM  
Blogger V said...

Ash: Oh girl, if you put together a subs vs. doms post based on male sterotypes and your own experiences--that would be some good shit.

3:00 PM  
Blogger Ashburnite said...

maybe I will.... I just don't know if I want to put my sexual history out there like that.

3:08 PM  
Blogger V said...

Ash: I'd suggest talking to friends and then make one big list so everyone can analyze anonymously.

3:12 PM  
Blogger Ashburnite said...

good idea...any experiences you might want to add? (you can email them) :-)

3:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's best she found out now that he was a freak instead of when it was too late.

You are right though, she may start resenting him and that won't be pretty.

I wonder how he even got her to go?

3:43 PM  
Blogger Sean said...

You were pretty much the devil in that conversation. How did you know he used to bring old girlfriends there? Oh that's right, your the devil. Al Pacino style.

4:24 PM  
Blogger Raincouver said...

It's every man's fantasy to have a threesome. But in the man's world, a threesome means two girls and a guy. Nothing else. this is the ONLY definition.

Test your man by suggesting two men and a girl, you. See how freaky he gets THAT time!


(but all the power to y'all if you can get your freak on)

5:11 PM  
Blogger Bad at Life said...

"I mean if pink polo shirts don't say "flog me," what does?"

I'm not sure I have ever heard a truer statement. Still, that's a little cold busting this guy to the fiance. I mean, that's the sort of thing you really ought to let them figure out on their own. I know I get pissed when people forewarn women I'm involved with about my chaps and clothespins.

5:54 PM  
Blogger Ashburnite said...

BAL- chaps and clothespins huh? You've piqued my interest :-)

6:24 PM  
Anonymous Scott said...

I have to back up my boy, BAL, on this one – your cock blockery may have been a little premature. What if his fantasy was to watch his bird in a cage with you guys and she had previous experience from her WASPY all-girls bible college? Maybe she was even freakier than him, but it was her first time trying to express it under bright lights and techno.

It is possible that she truly was turned off, however. If that's the case, then the engagement really is doomed, although not for the reason you provide. Healthy relationships are all about communication and knowing what you and your partner like. Not realizing that she wouldn't have fun at a kinky party is his first strike. Not standing up for herself is hers. It's hard to start a marriage when the count is 0-2.

7:32 PM  
Anonymous Jenny said...

This entry sparked a conversation between me and my boyfriend. We've always been open about discussing these topics (in fact, EN is on our "To-Do" list now) but it is always good to touch base about stuff now and again. Thanks for the inspiration to do just that!

8:22 AM  
Blogger KassyK said...

AHHH I have been wanting to discuss this with you as well...I think its virtually impossible to be with someone that you have completely diff sexual proclivites than. I rememeber that couple (I think). HAHA. I also remember some other scary things from that night...oh good lord PLEASE send me those pics first before they are posted. Lol.

10:21 AM  
Blogger KassyK said...

Oh and in response to Ash and the preppy guys--YES they are FREAKKKKY. But I've found that the freakiest guys are the arty types...The ones that either are singers/painters/etc...they are constantly trying to explore boundries...Me likey. :-)

10:22 AM  
Blogger V said...

Ash: I'll def think about it.

Chase: My guess was she is a pleaser as many women are and she didn't want to seem lamer than his ex--that's why he mentioned it.

Sean: Because the only thing I know better than women in their late 20s/early 30s are men in their late 20s/early 30s. And, I am the devil ;)

BAL: I'm kind of a bitch like that. I love to predict behavior, and talk about it...and it doesn't matter, I knew she wouldn't listen anyway.

Scott: MAYBE he just wants to see her dance up on girls, but if that's the case he just needs to get her drunk and take her to any bar in DC. He chose a swinger party that had many, many lesbians running around...and he used to go there w/ his ex...he said that to pressure her, which means he talking more than just voyeur. Natch, I could be wrong about it, but it's fun to speculate.

And, your advice is totally right about communication--you're going to be a great husband--

Jenny: No, thank you for letting me know--Circle V helping relationships--first time for everything!

Kassy: I am hoping to get them downloaded tonight and you'll be the first to see them (since it's mostly just me and you ;)

11:20 AM  
Anonymous slingblade said...

Ah wuz their tew and after yew left he tried to get me in a threesum wif her.

I done beat the bejezzus outer that city boy.

6:41 PM  

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